The other day, I was reading something about a girl who had stopped going to church because she felt like she wasn’t “good” enough. The story went into detail about why she felt that way, she had made some mistakes and was working on repenting. But in the meantime, she felt like she didn’t belong at church because of her mistakes. This is never the case for anyone, no matter the sin.
Something I have learned from making mistakes is that the best thing to do is repent sincerely and immediately. One of my favorite passages of scriptures is Alma 41:12-15. This is where Alma explains why it’s so important to repent now, not procrastinating until it’s too late. It’s why we don’t believe in deathbed repentance: You really have no opportunity to prove that you honestly have changed your spiritual clothes. Someone once told me about these parties that her friends would have called “come as you are” parties. Basically, they would invite people minutes before the party started and people would just come in whatever they were wearing at that moment. People would show up in weird clothes like pajamas, dirty art smocks and cooking aprons, they would show up with bare feet and crazy hair. And nobody cared, they didn’t criticize each other, they just accepted them no matter what they were wearing. Everyone got to see the human side of people that they usually saw polished up and formally presented. This person went on to tell me that when she was wearing something dirty or ratty around the house, her mom would ask, “what if someone invited you to a come as you are party right now?” She would then go change her clothes immediately. When I listened to her story, I thought of how we should always repent immediately. Because we never know when our time is coming, not that we should always be scared to die or anything. But our final breath can come as surprisingly as a phone call. And we’ll be judged on what we were wearing, spiritually speaking, when we pass away. I know someone that has always told people that he does what he wants in the moment and that he’ll repent later. This is not what the atonement is for, it is not an excuse to commit sins and then say that you’ll repent later. Repentance is for getting better. It is okay to use it if you are being sincere, but if you intend to make the mistake, assuming that you can repent later, it defeats the purpose. It’s human nature to put things off, especially when the things you need to do are difficult or uncomfortable. Changing into our “Sunday best” means giving up grudges and bad habits that have become as comfortable as worn PJs. But do you really want that final phone call to come when you’re wearing a dirty oversized t-shirt, or when you’re clean and dressed in your best? When the time comes, there will be no last-minute scrambling to change into your best – it’s how you are right now that matters.
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I think the best part of life is experiencing hard things and then a little ways down the road, you look back on them. And it’s in those moments, you realize why Heavenly Father gave you that trial. Then when you really think about it, it makes sense why you needed to experience it. Maybe later, you’ll realize that you can help others because of it. Or maybe it was because in the future, having that knowledge of what it feels like to go through something like that can be used to encourage others. It could also help you have confidence that if you could do that, this is going to be breeze.
There have been so many times where I think that there is no way I would be able to do something. I can get really overwhelmed and I start to doubt myself. The best thing I have found most helpful in these situations is to take a step back and remind yourself that everything is going to be okay. Because there is nothing that Heavenly Father will give you that you can’t handle. We are never left alone to deal with our trials, we have our Savior who can succor us. Adversity can come from a number of things. You see, different kinds of adversity require different responses. For example, people who are stricken with illness may simply need to be patient and faithful. People who suffer because of others’ words or actions should work toward forgiving those who have offended them. If a person’s trials come because of disobedience, he or she should correct the behavior and humbly seek forgiveness. When you repent, the sin committed is no longer stopping you from becoming more like Christ. I think when we are experiencing something tough, we need to remember that it is part of Heavenly Father’s plan for us. We may not see it at the time, but when Heavenly Father gives us trials, it is because He loves us and wants us to grow stronger. Its also important to remember that He has a bigger plan for us than we have for ourselves. And while His plan isn’t always the same as ours, it is always better. When I was a freshman, I this picture of what I wanted my life to be like and looking back at what I thought I wanted, I was so off. Even now, I don’t really know exactly what I want to be. But I do know that if I trust in my Heavenly Father, He’ll help me know what I am supposed to do. If you are feeling uncertain as to whether you can endure your trials, just know that Heavenly Father will always prepare a way for you to accomplish whatever is put in your way. Remember that you are never alone. Try to recognize and be grateful for the people that Heavenly Father puts in your life to teach you things that you need to know. I consider myself an expert on the subject of grace. Not because I have a better understanding of it than most people. I just know it when I see it and when I’ve felt it. And boy, how I’ve felt it. Perhaps I’m not really an expert at all, I just have a lot of practice. But even with all the years of messing up, and needing this grace, I still struggle with the most simple of questions: What is grace? I feel like we over complicate this subject when in reality, in it’s purest form, could not be more simple.
I remember someone once taught me that grace was Gained Righteousness at Christ’s Expense. Meaning that with Christ’s atonement, he purchased for us a way to have a relationship with Heavenly Father and the ability to return to live with him again. Which is something that we would never be able to earn for ourselves. It is a gift that could never have been given by anyone but the Savior. Once this gift is realized and put into use, it adequately covers everything. Every debt cancelled. Every sin - past, present and future - forgiven. So get ready because grace is a growing revolution and a worldly execution, meaning that if we leave the flesh behind it enlarges spiritual capacity to grow. By doing so we are stepping into a movement that continues to change the world by sharing the knowledge of redemption to everyone. This is a revolution that never dies. It only gets stronger and stronger. “What is grace?” You ask. Grace is the strength given to us through the Atonement of Jesus Christ. Grace is the enabling power and spiritual healing offered through Christ’s love and mercy. Grace can repair any sin. It is why Christ died for us, so that we could have his grace. It is because of grace that I have even a chance to return to live with my Heavenly Father again. Without grace I would never be able to make it through life without sin. I know that my Savior has been through all that I have and that he is there to succor me. He knows my needs and my trials. He knows worries and fears. I know that Christ has got my back. Heavenly Father has blessed me so much, I feel as though I can never fully repay Him for every blessing I have in my life. I would like to take a few moments to thank my Heavenly Father for such a wonderful life thus far.
Each night, after I’ve settled into bed, I think about the every blessing I received today from start to finish. I think about from the moment I rise off my knees from my morning prayers to the moment my head hits my comfy pillow for bed. It’s incredible how thankful you become when you take the time to acknowledge Heavenly Father every day. Heavenly Father is real and loves all his children. I promise if you look for His hand daily, you will find it. “Heavenly Father is constantly raining blessings upon us. It is our fear, doubt, and sin that, like an umbrella, block these blessings from reaching us.” -Dieter F. Uchtdorf Do not let fear, doubt, or sin keep you from obtaining a wondrous spiritual downpour of blessings. He loves you, no matter what mistakes you’ve made. It is beautiful life, so live it fully. Utilize the atonement. Allow Christ’s love to make you whole. John 16:33 reads, “These things I have spoken unto you, that in me ye might have peace. In the world ye shall have tribulation but be of good cheer, I have overcome the world.” I am so grateful for the atonement and the effect it has had on my life. I know that my Savior lives and wants us to come unto him. I never really understood the atonement until a couple of years ago. I used to think that Heavenly Father expected me to be able to make it back to Him on my own. Imagine how hard it would be to live a perfect life without the atonement--it would be impossible. Despite our best efforts, without the atonement, we would never make it back to live with our Heavenly Father again. We are always going to need the atonement in our lives. There is no sin that Christ’s grace cannot erase. If you have messed up and made a mistake that you feel is not fixable through the atonement, it is because Satan does not want you to feel as though you can repent. Satan would have us believe that whatever sin you have committed makes your salvation out of reach, but it is not. There is no sin that the atonement cannot fix. Satan would have us believe that there is no way we can be forgiven of our sins and it’s easy for us to believe it. But I know we can always be forgiven. Even if you think your sin is too big. One of my favorite stories in the bible is in Matthew 14. Jesus had been teaching a multitude of people on a mountain, when the people began to get hungry. Jesus’ disciples suggested that Jesus take a break from teaching. They said to have the people take a break to go find some food. Rather than sending the people away, Christ asks the multitude to give all that they have, which turns out to be only five loaves of bread and two fish. He then blesses the food that they do have and his disciples pass it out to the multitude. The two fishes and five loaves turn out to be more than enough to feed the five thousand. I alone am not enough. Neither were the five loaves and two fishes. But that is exactly what the atonement is for. Christ looks at what we have and we need and gives us whatever it is we don’t have. Someone once explained it to me this way. We are kind of like a plant, just as the plant cannot grow without water, we can not return to live with Heavenly Father without using the atonement. It is essential that we utilize the atonement. Without it, there is no way we would ever be able to return to live with our Heavenly Father again. Don’t ever be ashamed to have to use the atonement either. We all need it. I guarantee that no one but the Redeemer himself has or ever will be able to go through a lifetime without a mistake. We all make mistakes. Everyone that came before us has made them and everyone after us will make them. In fact, the very reason we were sent to this Earth is to make mistakes and learn from them. The atonement isn’t just for correcting our mistakes. Christ not only atoned for our sins, but suffered our afflictions so that we are not alone in our trials. It can be really hard when you’re going through something tough that no one can understand. It’s easy to feel alone. But we aren’t ever truly alone because we have the Savior who understands exactly how we feel at any given moment. Christ suffered in the Garden of Gethsemane so that he could succor us in our trials. He gets it. All of it. Every pain we feel, he has felt. All of frustration, sadness, guilt. He has felt it as well. We never have to walk alone. I know that all these things are true and that the atonement has the power to ease our burdens. I know that we have a loving Savior who died for us and wants us to rely on him. I also know we have a loving Heavenly Father that we can turn to with anything. I testify that the atonement is real and that it is for us to use whenever we need. Feeding the Five Thousand (The Miracle of the Loaves and Fishes), by James Tissot (62143); Primary manual 2-47; Primary manual 7-1
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My name is Ellie. I am a sophomore at BYU Idaho. I am excited to live life and to share a small piece of it with you!
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